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Thursday, February 7, 2013

Simplifying, not so simple

Some days, I really drive myself nuts.

I'm trying to simplify my life so I can focus on writing first, then computer art, then music.  So I have a pile of stuff to sell, I've managed to get down to 2 computers, and one guitar.. but..

I look at all the stuff to sell and keep thinking "But I could...".  It's hard to stop and tell myself that just because I COULD or MIGHT doesn't mean I SHOULD.  A new computer? Don't need it.  A second guitar? I don't play the one I have more than once or twice a week.  Drum machine.. don't use it at all.

So why do I have this weird desire to not only keep this stuff, but get more.. well.. "because I might want to use it some day".  No actual need for any of it, and if I put the money on the credit card or in savings, if I DO need it I can run off and get it THEN, when there's a PROVEN NEED.

Argh!  So I'm in a continual state of stress about it all, torn between a strong desire to minimize things and the sick urge to acquire things "while I have money".  I suppose it's a holdover from the feast-or-famine days of old, when Dad would either have a good contract and we were rich, or was between contracts and we were in deep conservation mode.

Just one more little bother to push through!  It's working well so far, the fewer things I have clamoring for attention, the more I actually accomplish!

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